She was trying. Honestly she was trying to get better, but it wasn't easy. For the first time, in an extremely long time, she didn't feel as safe as she once did. The moment she joined the Nightshade pack she felt like she finally belonged somewhere. Within the pack she did not feel like the despised pariah. Raven was happy to join their ranks without a need to fight for anything better. Just being accepted was good enough for her. She had done everything she possibly could to do something beneficial for each member of the pack. The only one member she couldn't do anything for was Nadya, and that was because the woman was never around. But she could do something for Tobias and Tetradore. From helping her Alpha with whatever paperwork needed to get done for the business side of the Ark, to keeping Tobias preoccupied, anything she did for her pack was supposed to be beneficial for them. But now that she was staying behind the walls of the Ark and spending more time within her room she was hardly doing anything for them. She knew she needed to get better, she knew she needed to get back in the a familiar routine, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. She needed help and she didn't know if any of them could help her.

She wasn't necessarily trying to better Tobias for herself...she was trying to better him for him. He asked her such a thing before and she was quite determined to help him understand just how this topsy-turvy world worked. Even the tiniest accomplishment with the deviant understanding something he hadn't known before was a step in the right direction. Though she wasn't the only one attempting to teach and show Tobias how to function...he was doing the same thing to her, only he was attempting to break away her human ways and show her animal side. Being feral it was dangerous for her to give into a side of her she was afraid to let go, but each time Tobias took her out for a day in the town in their fur, going on a hunt, or fighting in a ring allowed Raven to get a grip on a side of her she was worried about. Back and forth they were attempting to help the other embrace a side of themselves they may or may not know they had, even though it was tasking, it was beneficial for the two of them.

Always she was submissive creature hardly wanting to be involved confrontation unless absolutely necessary. Yet with her turbulent emotions and attempt to get over the physical, mental, and emotional damage she suffered from Frost she was having a difficult time holding it all in. She didn't mean to yell at him, she didn't mean to bring up his time with Nadya, but she hadn't had any time to take care of it all in a healthy manner. Like any animal, when stressed and cornered, she would do act in such a way to defend herself to get her out of such a jam. While she accepted his apology she noticed how he turned from her, how his neck flinched in such a way to protect the side where the permanent puncture marks from Tetradore remained. She had no idea that Tobias was punished after muttering an apology, but the young woman assumed that perhaps her sudden touch on his hands were the result of him acting cold to her. Indeed it had been an extremely long time since she allowed him to touch her, that a simple touch of his hands to cause him to recoil sadden her. But as she looked up at him she noticed the familiar rare sight of his eyes holding a golden hue that did not show any of his feline features. After voicing aloud her delectation she couldn't help but give him a small smile when he turns more towards her, bringing a finger to wrap around one of her many golden-brown curls. It was one of these small touches she had allowed the very first time she approved of such a thing. His mention of knowing a secret keeps her gaze on him, giving him her full attention during these rare moments when his other side showed. She hoped he understood, that both of them understood, that she accepted them both for who they were and she would not be leaving them, ever.

It was his sigh that caused one of her hands to gently slide down and press against his chest, a physical offer of helping his other side come back to her, bringing him a small smile. Seeing the golden flecks in his eyes slowly being swallowed by the familiar dark black hue, she knew this time for his other half would be gone in just a few seconds. His soft whisper traced with an impish grin caused the girl to lean her head closer to his own so she could hear...and what she heard instantly stunned her. For what felt like eternity she felt her heart beat stop, her ears suddenly were ringing, and she absolutely could not believe what she just heard. The second he whispered his secret she felt her legs slowly begin to give way, but thanks to one hand gripping his hand, and the other pressed on his chest she had managed to keep herself upright without showing her legs had failed her. Still standing near him she felt his lips press against hers and the young woman could not respond, and even if she could, she had no words to say. The very idea that he knew what marriage was...let alone actually admit that one day he would want to take her as his, seemed so very surreal. Rarely could a promise be sealed with a kiss, but in rare moments, Tobias had his own moments of acting romantic â€" whether he was attempting to do such a thing or not. The kiss may not have lasted long, but it was enough to rekindle the connection they had with one another. Her hand still gripping his own as he suddenly pulled away looking at her which absolutely shock, and surely her own scarred face must carry the same reaction still overcoming his whispered announcement. Bringing her hand off his chest and back to his other hand she would stare at him for a moment, watching as the last of the golden flecks disappeared in his eyes. Regaining some sort of thought she softly and slowly responded to his inquiry, while at the same time, trying to bring herself back from cloud nine.

"Love is similar to liking something, but...stronger. Love is like...someone or something that is the best, it's your favorite, and nothing else could replace the thing you love the most. If you love a person, you care for them, and would do anything for them."

Seeing his dazed look she gave him a small simper as she attempted to give him a variety of examples. Love can come in all shapes and sizes, but it can also be given to an item, an idea, or a person. Raven knew that when introducing her devious companion into something unfamiliar, she knew it was best to take it slow and easy, gently taking him down the right direction, as best as she could.

"Take for example colors...you like the color red, but your favorite color is blue. Or food for example, you like chicken, but you love steak...it is your favorite. Your favorite, or someone you love, can be for a person too."

Unsure if he would grasp with what she was attempting to explain to him she would look away from him for a moment. She knew this time had been difficult for him, just as much as it was for her, and she knew earlier on she had spoken out of turn. It wasn't like her to yell at him and she regretted doing such a thing. Softly she spoke her apology hoping the leopard would understand that Raven was aware she was in the wrong, but also that he still needed to be supportive. His demand for dinner was met with a nod as she let go of his hand and began to follow him out of the room, brushing her shoulder against him in a familial manner, as she inquired just what it was he wanted. After all she was trying to bring herself back into a familiar state, and one way of doing so, was following whatever her companion wanted from her.

"Sure Tobi. Do you want me to make dinner or do you want us to hunt it?"

Raven Clocksworth.