I will

rise up

in spite of the ache

The last thing Henry ever wanted to do was make life more difficult for Sterling. He loved the man who sat at the bar. There was nothing Sterling could say or do that would ever make him doubt the love he felt. His heart had been breaking over and over again, each time Sterling pushed him away. And yet, somehow, his love still lingered. And despite everything, it only grew.

But even Henry was smart enough to realize that no matter how much he loved Sterling, no matter how many times he put himself between Sterling and death, it would never be enough. His love would never be enough for Sterling and it was this very thought that broke Henry further.

As he stood with his hand on the doorknob, his fingers ready to turn it and walk back out of Sterling's life, perhaps forever, he paused. He tried to tell Sterling how much he missed him, but he thought better of the words. Tonight was not about his feelings. He didn't come here to make Sterling muddle the feelings of love and safety. Henry had to be okay with the fact that Sterling was alive. Perhaps he was only destined to love Sterling from afar.

And just as he began to turn the knob, he heard Sterling ask him what he wanted to say, the words he was too afraid to utter out loud. Henry could hear the vulnerability in his voice and the better part of him told him that now was not the time. Sterling needed to sort through his own feelings without his judgement being clouded. And yet, Henry couldn't stop his fingers from letting go of the doorknob.

He turned slowly, the softness of his blues eyes resting on Sterling. His heart ached at the scene before him. Sterling clung to himself, a tear winding down the side of his cheek. It broke his heart to see Sterling like this.

And despite his better judgement, Henry moved back across the room. His strides were long and with a purpose. Thumb brushed against his cheek, effectively wiping away that single tear. "I miss you..." His words were soft, the volume of his voice just a whisper. And without thinking, Henry leaned forward and pressed his lips to those of Sterling, letting the kiss linger before building unless it was unwanted. But if it was wanted and accepted, Henry would deepen it, pouring himself into the single action. And as his lips pulled away, Henry remained close. "...I love you." He had never stopped loving Sterling. He sighed as he pulled away, knowing that perhaps the kiss was a bit too much. Perhaps it was unwanted. But regardless of what Sterling may or may not be feeling, Henry didn't regret it.

Henry Tudor

I will rise a thousands times again